Moved To Trash…

16 Jul

My ’10 week 10 pound’ challenge – during the past 8 weeks I’ve managed to GAIN a further 5lb - I seem set to speed back up to my original weight – I’m really depressed, demoralised and disenchanted with myself! All those positive good things I achieved last year are slowly but surely slipping through my fingers as old habits return with a vengeance and a familiar puffed out face starts to appear in my mirror.

This is so unfathomable to me – why I have let this happen, especially as I have the holiday of a lifetime on the horizon – it’s too late now to even think about getting to goal – if I didn’t eat for the next two weeks I’m not going to be anywhere near 10st 8lb… all I could hope to see on the scales in two weeks would be a 2lb loss – 4lb at a real push and let’s be honest, I don’t want to be a defeatist but……… it just isn’t going to happen – if I can maintain my current weight – now that is more realistic – it would also be a minor miracle!

Yesterday I rejoined the gym and today I’m having the old familiar guilt feelings – I know I should go, I should get dressed and just get out to the gym and make a start with a bit of enthusiasm and positive energy… I’m digging deep but I can’t seem to find any…

12lbs on has taken me from a size 10 to a size 14! I think it’s because not only did I gain the pounds, I stopped exercising altogether so my firm bits went back to wobbly bits in no time at all!

 

15th July 2012 and the weight back on is beginning to show!

I can’t even put into words how unhappy this is making me feel… So – what am I going to do about it? I know 10st 8lbs is my ‘on top of the world’ weight - it’s also a realistic weight for my age – and for the fact that I have spent so long yo-yo dieting and it has taken a toll on my skin! I have already ruled out being at 10st 8lb for L.A. it’s just seriously not going to happen. So… here is what I’m going to do… 

1. having re joined the gym – I’m going to make the effort to go at least twice this week, just to get re-acquainted with it! 

2. I’m going to start recording what I’m eating again on My Fitness Pal 

3. I can’t do diet chef long-term, there is no maintainance support - I still haven’t used up my lunches and dinners from a previous order – so I’m going to look for a healthy way of eating that is based on natural unprocessed foods. 

4. I’m giving up processed sugar – at the moment I’ve even wondered if I’m on the edge of diabetes I have been craving chocolate and sweet things like a woman possessed – so I need to deal with this! So… I’m making that start today and I’m taking it a day at a time again. 

About these ads

5 Responses to “Moved To Trash…”

  1. babsallen07Barbara allen July 16, 2012 at 11:10 am #

    This stage of frustation is so difficlt to deal with, I wake each morning determined to take control of my input, suddenly another force takes over & I weaken, my body mind & soal crave every morsel of prohibited food. So I understand fully where you are coming from. You have done amazing in the past, now that you have had your mad eating period you will get back on track. You have to remember a lot of stressful stuff messes up our willpower, you for one had your new buisness venture & all the hic-ups that go with it, as well as other inevitable day to day problems. You know you can do it,its not easy I know, as each time we lose control, its that little more difficult to regain . Perhaps some of us are mentaly built to manage our lives in this inconsistant manner & maybe we have to learn to live with the ups & downs of our body image. Dont beat yourself up over this, just accept you will deal with it in your own time. Your write ups always motivated me, but like you I fall off the diet train often, then pick myself up & try again. Good luck & record as often as you can .I miss your frequent & often funny reports, your sense of homour is a tonic, lots of good wishes. x

    • dizidaisy July 17, 2012 at 10:04 pm #

      Thank you so much Barbara!!! Yes, I’ve been really frustrated with myself – but you’re quite right – stress plays havoc with the way I eat, when I’m stressed I want to indulge myself and eating is the quickest, most easily accessible and cheapest fix!

      Thank you for your support and encouragement and the lovely things you’ve said – I truly appreciate them – it’s given me a boost!

      I hope things are going well for you! xxx

  2. Beth July 16, 2012 at 10:26 pm #

    Oh dear, Miss Daisy! First, don’t you dare think of yourself as anything resembling a failure. Good thoughts only, thank you very much! Failures don’t do what you’ve done, right? Now, I think you have some reasonable plans for getting back on the bandwagon. Rejoining the gym is a great start. Even if you just go and walk, nothing more. The same goes for blending the leftover DC into a diet that’s pretty clean in its make up. As for the sugar, after a few days, you won’t crave it as much. It gets easier to stay off the sugar the longer you’ve done it. But your body *will* crave it for a couple of days.

    • dizidaisy July 17, 2012 at 10:07 pm #

      Oh Beth!!! It has been such an uphill struggle and most of the time I’ve been sliding down the hill!!! Thank you for the pep talk! I definitely need it right now – I hope everything is going well for you! You’re such an inspiration and a wonder motivator! Thank you xxx

  3. Optifast Blogger July 18, 2012 at 5:07 am #

    As always, our lives seem to run in parallel! I did well for so long, even to the one year mark, but lately things have not gone well, too many vacations, too much confidence that I can ignore what I’ve learned and done over the last year – water, exercise, staying away from alcohol, bad carbs, yummy restaurants, etc., and way way too much stress.

    It is so depressing to outgrow clothes that you worked so hard to fit into. I do know how you feel – I’m there. I hope we both can get turned around – sounds like you are making a good start – and retrace our steps to being healthier, slimmer and more fit. Good luck!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Follow

Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 99 other followers

%d bloggers like this: